.sudah terang lagikan bersuluh.

'we shuden make sumbody a priority when we are clearly their option'

i read it sumwhere (tak igt kat mane).

honestly, shud we do dat? org melayu kate jgn muke tersorong2. tapi macamane kalau org tuh adelah our loved ones. maybe their ignorance is a sign dat they are just having sum problems? haiz.

the tell-tale signs shud be obvious.



dedicated to YOU.

.irritating juniors.

masok kandang kambing mengembek, masok kandang lembu meguak, masok umah aku merespekla org yang len.

tau tak pe.

.new perspective.

it's very important to find new perspective in life. well, especially life. it's nice to hang out with new ppl and discover new things. it duzen matter that u're old frens duzen remember about you. if they ignored you, it is not that you can't survive it. what is more important is to enjoy life as it is a process of learning. however it is, think about yourself first. not to become selfish or arrogant, but most important is future. what's gone be bygone. if frens are forever, they will come around.

m so happy.

jumpe teddy and spent sumtyms with him. afta so long tak jumpe die n tak bermanje2 ngn die. really, he smells so nice.

.bonjela cannot cure heartache.

things started to fall to its places ryt about now. sure. loneliness and heartache are 2 of my besfrens. but sure, there's too short a distance to say anything about the future ahead of me. many of those sacrifices has been done unwillingly. but for now, i cannot promise anything for me and him. i try to be anything but to ruin us. try not to do any bad to us. i try so hard dat i think my heart cud give up. everything. honestly, i forgot the feeling when he held my hand. i forgot the feeling of being love by him. izit wrong for me to not remember us?

so many yers i have left this blog. been thinking for a while. about how i shud spend sum tyms updating my blog, but dis fxxked up cnnection. mmgla malas nak online. paling tak pon online kat ym jek.

neways, as it said, so many things already changed. m not the person i used to be now. i mean i have my priorities and things to consider now. not only about me. sumhow, i found dat my life now is ... how may i describe? complicated yet a pleasure. i wud never trade any other life other than this. despite the mistake, the GRAND mistake dat been made, it turns out to be sumtin dat makes me grow up.

i always wana be sumone but m not sure who, but now, m ready to went thru with whoever i end up to be. becoz i know i am sumone now.

hopefully dis blog wud be the witness of my happening in life. the reminder of who i was and what m becoming.

:cheers:

long tym no see

it's been a while since i updated my blog. got problem with my comp actually. cant online as well. neways. everything about my life has already changed. m now a completely different person. nothing about me is the same now. literally. funny thing about life is u might think dat u get everything on its place when its really not. my life is so dysfunctional ryt now. like i have the tool but cannot use it. really.

but wutever it is, i now have aim in life. not a wanderer nemore. and i pray hard, very, ver, very, very hard dat m gonna get wut i aim for. thing is, m so goddamn scare if i lose them. both the person i love the most in this whole wide world. m scare i'll never see them again. 3yers is really a long tym to hang on. really. everything can happen in that period of tym.

....................

ya allah tuhan yang maha pengasih,

janganla Kau jauhkan aku dari matlamat hidup ku. Kau kuatkan lah hatiku. tetapkanlah diriku pada matlamatku. sesungguhnya Kau la tuhan yang maha pemurah dan maha penyayang.

Amin ya Rabbal 'alamin